Our Faith Is Fragile

I’d like to think that I have at least a little faith, but I’m not sure how much faith I need.  I would like to have enough faith to believe in God and His Word ... as if they are one.  I don’t have any problem believing in God ... the existence of God.  Just look around.  The evidence of intelligent design is everywhere.

It’s applying His word to various situations like healing that I struggle with.  1st Peter 2:24, speaking of Jesus states ... “by whose stripes ye were healed.”  Peter is quoting Isaiah 53:5 which looking ahead to Jesus says ... “and with his stripes we are healed.”  But yet, knowing Jesus was scourged and beaten bloody for our healing, when I apply what I believe is faith to these scriptures, asking God for what they say ... the healing already bought and paid for by Jesus ... well, the answer sometimes just doesn’t come.

Believing God takes faith.  Faith!  Dear God ... why didn’t you give us something easier to use and deal with?  Every time I take hold of faith and tell myself, “This time I’m going to believe it, trust God, and he is going to answer my prayer” ... doubt seems to appear and question what I just told myself.  Doubt!

Where did that come from?  Do we catch it like a cold or something?  Is it in the air or did I get too close to a non-believer?  Surely doubt isn’t a part of me like the red blood cells circulating in my veins throughout my body.  If I get therapy ... which I most likely need anyway ... can I learn to suppress doubt and unbelief?

I don’t want to admit it, but doubt and unbelief seems to be at home in me.  It’s like what the Apostle Paul said about sin ... it’s a law ... sin was still within his flesh.  He states in Chapter 7 of Romans ... (edited from the K.J.V.) ...

“But I am carnal, sold under sin. For that which I hate, (sin) is what I do. Now it is no more I that do it, but it’s the sin that dwelleth in me. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) dwelleth no good thing. Now if I do evil, it is no longer I that do it, but the sin nature that dwelleth in me. I find then a law, that when I want to do good, evil is present with me.”

Let me repeat Paul’s words as if they are from me speaking about doubt as he did with sin ... “I find then a law, that when I want to believe God’s word, doubt and unbelief is present with me.”  It just seems to be there every time I make an effort to believe God; though not on all issues such as salvation or the sovereignty of God ... mainly it is reserved to the area of divine healing.

Do you remember the father in Scripture that asked Jesus for help because the disciples could not cast out an evil spirit from his son?  This story is found in Chapter 9 of Mark ... (again edited).

The father said to Jesus, “I have brought unto thee my son, which hath a mute spirit; and this spirit seizes and tears at him on the ground, convulsing with spasms; and he froths at the mouth like an epileptic, and he grates his teeth and he rolls about. I spoke to thy disciples that they should cast him out; and they could not.”

Jesus then says ... “Bring him unto me.”  And He asked the father, “How long has it been since this came unto him? And he said, from infancy.”

Because the disciples could not help his son, the father says ... “But if you can do any thing, have compassion on us, and help us.”  If you can?  That doesn’t sound like faith to me.

Jesus responds back ... “If you can just believe, all things are possible to him that believes.”

Immediately the father of the child cried out, and said with tears ... “Lord, I believe, help my unbelief.”

“Jesus rebuked the foul spirit, and it came out of him: and Jesus took him by the hand, and lifted him up; and he arose.”

This man had both ... faith to believe, (that's why he asked Jesus) and at the same time doubt and unbelief were present as he cried out ... if you can ... help.

Honestly ... isn’t that all of us?  Come on now.  That father sounds a lot like me.  I believe the Lord, but at the same time, I seem to have unbelief.  It comes automatically as part of the fallen nature of man.  But ... if you are born again, aren’t you supposed to be a new creature, and all things are now new because Jesus is living inside you?

 Again ... really?  Is that your confession?  Is that what happened to you?  The day after you accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior, you got out of bed and ... Wow!  Everything was new and exciting.  Temptations, tests, problems all seemed to go away ... no, I don’t think so.

But is it not true that you should now have a new strength inside of you so the old desires may not tug as strong at you as they did; but most people find that it takes time before there is a real noticeable change in who you are.

There’s a scripture that James starts his letter to believers with, that I want to consider.  He states in chapter 1, verses 2-3 ... (edited for subject clarity) ...

“My brethren ... when ye fall into various temptations (a proving experience) ... know this ... the trying (testing) of your faith works (accomplishes) patience (endurance).”

Now why do we need this patient endurance?  Could it be because God doesn’t get in any hurry sending the answers to our prayers?  Just asking ...

The second point James makes that grabs my attention is verses 6-7.  It’s an instructional warning about asking in faith and the result if you don’t do as he says.  (again edited) ...

“Let him ask in faith, nothing (not even once) wavering (to withdraw or hesitate) ... for if he wavers ... that man shall not receive anything from the Lord.”

James has just been talking about going through something that tries or tests your faith.  In verse 5, he assumes you may need wisdom in dealing with the matter, (my words not his) so he says in verses 6-7, when you ask for this wisdom ... “ask in faith without wavering” ... which is what doubt causes you to do.  To waver is to question or doubt.

Therefore, would I be right in saying, “if you waver ... you might as well forget it ... your faith won’t work.  Your doubt has nullified your faith.”

Man that’s hard.  But God doesn’t grade on a curve.  To God, faith must be just like salvation.  God’s list has only two columns ... you are either saved or lost.  Just like you can’t be a little bit pregnant ... either you are or you’re not.  Faith is the same way; it’s either faith or doubt.

Faith with a little bit of doubt or unbelief mixed in is like making an apple pie with a little bit of dog poop mixed in.  I don’t want anything to do with that one.  No thanks, I’ll pass.  Same with God ... or so it seems.

Do you know why God, not only allows, but sometimes even sends the testing?  I believe it’s so you can prove your faith ... not to Him, He already knows ... but to yourself.  Things do go wrong ... don’t they?  That’s why auto makers crash test their cars.  They need to know how well they will hold up under the stress of being hit hard.  It tests the car’s integrity; how strong it is, how well it holds together, and if it will save your life when it gets crushed.  God also tests the integrity of your faith.  But there’s hope ...

Psalms 34:19 ... “Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the LORD delivereth him out of them all.”

The Apostle Paul, in Timothy 3:11, puts the above Psalm into his own words and tells Timothy ... “Persecutions, afflictions, which came unto me ... I endured: but out of them all the Lord delivered me.”  And what Paul said is true ... except for the last imprisonment in Rome when he was beheaded.

The truth is, our faith is fragile ... like glass.  The lyrics of a new country song seems to fit what I am trying to communicate ...

“We may shine, we may shatter, we may be picking up the pieces here on after, we are fragile, we are human, we are shaped by the light we let through us, but we break fast ... ‘cause we are glass.”

It seems to me that many of us, broken by life, have spent much of our time waiting on the Lord to pick up the shattered pieces of what is left of our faith.  And in time He will.

So this is where I’m at.  When needs arise, when trouble comes again, whether mine or someone else’s ... I’m going to ask God for His help and make a real effort to trust Him and then leave it in His hands.  I want to do more ... but I don’t know what else to do.

Someday I hope to be able to say what David said in Psalms 34:6 ... “This poor man cried, and the LORD heard him, and saved him out of all his troubles.”

I said someday ... I’m not there yet.




Comments welcome.